ottokeh??

Raya..medan tersibuk utk bertanyakan soalan cepuk cemas+ rimas.. Bla nk kawin? Kes ako undur satu tapak: bla nk ada boyfriend?..ha haaah!! Ako pernah post b4 about the man yg fits the pic..poyo kan? Boleh pulak nk main pilih2!hengat hot sangat bnyk kumbang nk hingap? Phuiiii!! Tambah2 lak bestie sorang yg jongos lebih dr ako..dh sah jd isteri org hari ni..olala.. Tp pikir2 blk..timbang2 blk..ako still rasa ako sgt tak sesuai to be attached to..giving some space in your heart to someone else..dah rasa sesak dh hati ako ngan people that has been with me for years..dh berakar dh..how to accommodate more?? How to celeb raya with your-non-blood-family? How to eat on a table that was originally meant for 4 and now there's addition to it?? Worst of all: how..how to err love??

I am sorry

I am sorry..
I am sorry that i am not pretty enough to catch the male’s attention from miles ahead…
I am sorry i am not cute enough to have people turn twice at me..
I am sorry i have nothing on my features that stands out..
I am sorry i am not fragile enough to have male competing to protect me.. to help me…
I am sorry my presence brings annoyance rather than enjoyment
I am sorry i grew up so blunt and straight..
I am sorry i am not warm enough..
I am sorry for being cold and stone hearted..
I am sorry for being boring and idealess..
I am sorry i don’t have the magical hand.. I messed things up rather than fix them
I am sorry my heart is not pure and naïve enough to be loosing grip in the purest way..

Sometimes..

I felt that i am sorry.. I am sorry Marina.. I am sorry that u have to be me.. You have to be this difficult and tangled.. I am sorry.. I really am..